For Mothers Day, a few thoughts about my own dear Mother and the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
There is truly no one else in this world who shares my joys and my pains like my mother. During my hardest struggles, she cries with me. At my greatest successes, she rejoices with me. Sometimes I have wondered if certain trials I've faced have been even harder for her than for me. I know she rejoices right along with me as I follow Heavenly Father through my life and make good choices and taste the happy fruit of those choices. She knows what I've experienced throughout my life and how those experiences have shaped me into who I am. She understands how I think. She loves me, and she "gets" me. I can not adequately express how much this means to me. While, on one hand, I don't like that she ever experiences pain over me, that is outweighed by how sweet and wonderful and comforting it is to know that there is someone who loves me and knows me so well. I am never alone. I can always count on her prayers. I can always count on her being right there with me through thick and thin. It is so comforting to be able to talk to her and know she not only really, really cares, but really understands too. I don't have words to express how grateful I am for my mother's love and caring, and the wonderful relationship we have.
Now here is the truly amazing thing. In the above paragraph, you could take out the word "mother" and replace it with "Savior," and it would be just as true. There is actually someone who knows me, loves me, and understands my joys and sorrows even better than my mother does. Thats amazing in itself. And He doesn't just understand how I feel because he knows me. He understands how I feel because He has felt it himself, in the exact context of how I feel it, in the same way that I feel it (see Alma 7:11-12). I can't really fathom the kind of love my mother has for me, and He actually has more!
How thankful I am for my amazing mother. Her love for me is not only a blessing in itself, but it illuminates my relationship with my Savior and His love for me. Many, many thanks to my amazing mother, and many thanks to my amazing Savior, Redeemer, and friend.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Saturday, June 18, 2011
To my brothers, who have suggested I go ahead and "be that girl"
...I so am that girl.
Behold, the big, ugly, prickly, overgrown haven to spiders and other critters that has been the bane of my doorstep for the almost two years I've lived here.
In a heap. Because I sawed it to the ground!
And now the sun is shining on my doorstep!
(and if the landlord asks, yes, we "trimmed" the bushes)
Friday, February 11, 2011
Why Congress Shouldn't Abandon Public Broadcasting, and Why You Should Care
President John F. Kennedy said, "I am certain that after the dust of centuries has passed over our cities, we, too, will be remembered not for our victories or defeats in battle or in politics, but for our contribution to the human spirit."
I love that sentiment. I hope it is true, because I hope that future generations will look at history with an eye pointed to the things that truly made a difference to the quality of the lives of individual people.
So how do we contribute to the human spirit? There are many ways, in my opinion. And they all start with education-- Education in reading, culture, history, science, music, theater, politics... the list goes on. Education then opens the door to creativity, the combining of seemingly unrelated bits of knowledge to form something that wasn't thought of before. Every major advance in our society has started with an idea. In other words, creativity. It's essential. At the risk of overgeneralizing, I would venture to say that the freedom to create and access to the resources and education that fosters creativity are what have made America the world leader it is.
Which leads me to my point.
In the next few days Congress will vote on a bill that would cut 100% of funding to public broadcasting - the television, radio, and online resources which, for many Americans, are some of the few - if not only - means they have to access information through which they can practice creativity. Did you know that every public broadcasting outlet has to comply with strict FCC regulations that ensure their service is accessible to as much of their constituency as reasonably possible? That means that the underprivileged child whose parents can't afford cable or satellite needs nothing but a TV and an antennae to watch PBS programs that will help him or her learn to read and do math. That child needs only a radio to listen to the Metropolitan Opera broadcast every Saturday afternoon and foster a love for beautiful music and culture (like Eve Queller, for example, who recently received NEA Opera Honors for the innovative way she broadened the accessibility of opera to the people of New York City). Lets not fail to mention that public broadcasting is possibly the only place left in our society where one can find unbiased, clear news reporting. The American people - you and me - have access to knowledge and culture of limitless variety through public broadcasting.
The idea behind this congressional vote is to cut the deficit for the benefit of future generations, and that is a good thing. But, completely cutting off funding to public broadcasting is too extreme. Cut back a little, sure. But it would be an absolute tragedy (and sad irony) if, in an effort to leave dollars behind for our children, we take away a vital resource for building spirit and creativity, and thus deprive them of the advances and luxuries we ourselves enjoy.
To provide a little insight into how funding works in public broadcasting, here's some info. Some stations, like Maryland Public Television (MPT), are state-owned. That means they get a large amount of funding from the state government. However, they are the exception not the rule. Most stations receive only a small percentage of their operating budget from the government. Federal and state funding combined account for well less than 10% of the budget of WETA, Washington DC's station. The majority of funding - more than half - comes from individual contributions. Second in dollars is corporate underwriting. That's the sponsor spots you see between programs on PBS. Think "funding for this program is being provided by X company." There are strict rules about what kind of content can be included in an underwriting spot, so that it never comes off as trying to sway the opinion of the audience. The point is, federal funding is already small in comparison to other forms of funding. PBS isn't busting Capitol Hill's wallet. But, that little bit of funding is vitally important to stations' ability to produce and air the quality programs you know and love.
If you know me much at all you know that I'm never one to push a political agenda on anyone, so please don't take this that way. I would just ask you to give this some thought. It took some thought for me. If you, like me, conclude that federal support of public broadcasting should continue, please call or email your congressman NOW. They are voting in the next few days. It is a matter of urgency.
More information:
http://www.weta.org/support/federalfunding
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/02/03/AR2011020306395.html
I work at WETA, but these thoughts and comments are entirely my own. Please do not mistake them for anything official.
I love that sentiment. I hope it is true, because I hope that future generations will look at history with an eye pointed to the things that truly made a difference to the quality of the lives of individual people.
So how do we contribute to the human spirit? There are many ways, in my opinion. And they all start with education-- Education in reading, culture, history, science, music, theater, politics... the list goes on. Education then opens the door to creativity, the combining of seemingly unrelated bits of knowledge to form something that wasn't thought of before. Every major advance in our society has started with an idea. In other words, creativity. It's essential. At the risk of overgeneralizing, I would venture to say that the freedom to create and access to the resources and education that fosters creativity are what have made America the world leader it is.
Which leads me to my point.
In the next few days Congress will vote on a bill that would cut 100% of funding to public broadcasting - the television, radio, and online resources which, for many Americans, are some of the few - if not only - means they have to access information through which they can practice creativity. Did you know that every public broadcasting outlet has to comply with strict FCC regulations that ensure their service is accessible to as much of their constituency as reasonably possible? That means that the underprivileged child whose parents can't afford cable or satellite needs nothing but a TV and an antennae to watch PBS programs that will help him or her learn to read and do math. That child needs only a radio to listen to the Metropolitan Opera broadcast every Saturday afternoon and foster a love for beautiful music and culture (like Eve Queller, for example, who recently received NEA Opera Honors for the innovative way she broadened the accessibility of opera to the people of New York City). Lets not fail to mention that public broadcasting is possibly the only place left in our society where one can find unbiased, clear news reporting. The American people - you and me - have access to knowledge and culture of limitless variety through public broadcasting.
The idea behind this congressional vote is to cut the deficit for the benefit of future generations, and that is a good thing. But, completely cutting off funding to public broadcasting is too extreme. Cut back a little, sure. But it would be an absolute tragedy (and sad irony) if, in an effort to leave dollars behind for our children, we take away a vital resource for building spirit and creativity, and thus deprive them of the advances and luxuries we ourselves enjoy.
To provide a little insight into how funding works in public broadcasting, here's some info. Some stations, like Maryland Public Television (MPT), are state-owned. That means they get a large amount of funding from the state government. However, they are the exception not the rule. Most stations receive only a small percentage of their operating budget from the government. Federal and state funding combined account for well less than 10% of the budget of WETA, Washington DC's station. The majority of funding - more than half - comes from individual contributions. Second in dollars is corporate underwriting. That's the sponsor spots you see between programs on PBS. Think "funding for this program is being provided by X company." There are strict rules about what kind of content can be included in an underwriting spot, so that it never comes off as trying to sway the opinion of the audience. The point is, federal funding is already small in comparison to other forms of funding. PBS isn't busting Capitol Hill's wallet. But, that little bit of funding is vitally important to stations' ability to produce and air the quality programs you know and love.
If you know me much at all you know that I'm never one to push a political agenda on anyone, so please don't take this that way. I would just ask you to give this some thought. It took some thought for me. If you, like me, conclude that federal support of public broadcasting should continue, please call or email your congressman NOW. They are voting in the next few days. It is a matter of urgency.
More information:
http://www.weta.org/support/federalfunding
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/02/03/AR2011020306395.html
I work at WETA, but these thoughts and comments are entirely my own. Please do not mistake them for anything official.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Introducing Mission 2011
Mission 2010: Say YES to Adventures was a success beyond my wildest expectations. A general policy of ignoring inhibitions and experiencing new things opened my eyes, my heart, my perspective. At the risk of sounding cliche, it really did change my life.
And that leads me to Mission 2011. The same concept. Put aside inhibitions. Ignore all the excuses we, for some silly reason, seem trained to come up with any time an opportunity comes before us that is in the slightest bit uncomfortable, unfamiliar, or difficult. Just say YES. Do it.
Mission 2011 is Say YES to Service.
A bit more challenging than Mission 2010, I admit, but isn't that the point? Exploration. Growth. A push to be something better. But really, this is challenging. Service is a broad topic. It encompasses everything from organized service projects, to helping a friend or neighbor in need, to offering directions to the person who looks lost on the street, to volunteering to be the one who gets off the couch to grab snacks during movie night. If it involves doing something for another person, it's service. It counts. Just like if it was something I had never done before, it counted as an adventure.
So this leads me to my recent big revelation (no really, I mean that). Last Sunday I attended a Fireside where the speaker presented an interesting challenge. He suggested that we go an entire week without asking Heavenly Father for a single thing for ourselves. Nothing at all related to our own self interest. Instead, ask, "Who can I help? How can I help them?" I felt like this would be a good experiment for me, given the whole Mission 2011 thing. So, I put in one final plea for myself, which was that Heavenly Father teach me whatever lesson I needed to learn from this, and the self-interested requests stopped there. And so my experimental prayer week commenced. As the first few days went by, however, I never did feel entirely comfortable with it.
Then, the other night, I was listening to The Mormon Channel (my new favorite thing ever, btw), and they were playing an old BYU Devotional given by Elder Holland. In classic Elder Holland style, it was a powerful message about the Savior - following Him, becoming like Him, trusting in His love for us and allowing Him to take away our sorrows. He talked about how much we matter to our Savior. Because he loves us so perfectly, what matters to us matters to Him.
Then I realized why the whole prayer thing wasn't sitting right with me. It's okay for me to talk to Heavenly Father about me, because he really cares about me. If it matters to me - even in the smallest way, even if its something that probably isn't really that significant in the whole eternal scheme of things - it matters to Him. And it makes Him happy when I come to Him and talk to Him about it.
If it matters to me, it matters to Him.
So that means...
If it matters to that random guy on the street, it matters to the Savior. Because He loves that guy. And, what matters to my Savior, matters to me. Because I love Him, and have covenanted to follow Him and be a part of His work.
That is Christlike love. That is charity. It's all about what really matters to you. We all know that we should love everyone around us because they are God's children and our brothers and sisters in God's family. But, I think it's hard to figure out how to actually, honestly do that. I think this is the answer.
What matters to "that guy" matters to my Savior. Therefore, what matters to "that guy" matters to me.
And that's why I say YES to serving "that guy." In whatever way he needs. Even if it doesn't make sense to me why it's important. If it matters to him, it matters to my Savior, so it matters to me.
Less than a month in, Mission 2011 has been revised. No, enhanced. Say YES to Loving Service.
Because that's what it's about - caring, loving, letting that person really matter to you.
Have I mentioned how awesome it is how God answers prayers?
And that leads me to Mission 2011. The same concept. Put aside inhibitions. Ignore all the excuses we, for some silly reason, seem trained to come up with any time an opportunity comes before us that is in the slightest bit uncomfortable, unfamiliar, or difficult. Just say YES. Do it.
Mission 2011 is Say YES to Service.
A bit more challenging than Mission 2010, I admit, but isn't that the point? Exploration. Growth. A push to be something better. But really, this is challenging. Service is a broad topic. It encompasses everything from organized service projects, to helping a friend or neighbor in need, to offering directions to the person who looks lost on the street, to volunteering to be the one who gets off the couch to grab snacks during movie night. If it involves doing something for another person, it's service. It counts. Just like if it was something I had never done before, it counted as an adventure.
So this leads me to my recent big revelation (no really, I mean that). Last Sunday I attended a Fireside where the speaker presented an interesting challenge. He suggested that we go an entire week without asking Heavenly Father for a single thing for ourselves. Nothing at all related to our own self interest. Instead, ask, "Who can I help? How can I help them?" I felt like this would be a good experiment for me, given the whole Mission 2011 thing. So, I put in one final plea for myself, which was that Heavenly Father teach me whatever lesson I needed to learn from this, and the self-interested requests stopped there. And so my experimental prayer week commenced. As the first few days went by, however, I never did feel entirely comfortable with it.
Then, the other night, I was listening to The Mormon Channel (my new favorite thing ever, btw), and they were playing an old BYU Devotional given by Elder Holland. In classic Elder Holland style, it was a powerful message about the Savior - following Him, becoming like Him, trusting in His love for us and allowing Him to take away our sorrows. He talked about how much we matter to our Savior. Because he loves us so perfectly, what matters to us matters to Him.
Then I realized why the whole prayer thing wasn't sitting right with me. It's okay for me to talk to Heavenly Father about me, because he really cares about me. If it matters to me - even in the smallest way, even if its something that probably isn't really that significant in the whole eternal scheme of things - it matters to Him. And it makes Him happy when I come to Him and talk to Him about it.
If it matters to me, it matters to Him.
So that means...
If it matters to that random guy on the street, it matters to the Savior. Because He loves that guy. And, what matters to my Savior, matters to me. Because I love Him, and have covenanted to follow Him and be a part of His work.
That is Christlike love. That is charity. It's all about what really matters to you. We all know that we should love everyone around us because they are God's children and our brothers and sisters in God's family. But, I think it's hard to figure out how to actually, honestly do that. I think this is the answer.
What matters to "that guy" matters to my Savior. Therefore, what matters to "that guy" matters to me.
And that's why I say YES to serving "that guy." In whatever way he needs. Even if it doesn't make sense to me why it's important. If it matters to him, it matters to my Savior, so it matters to me.
Less than a month in, Mission 2011 has been revised. No, enhanced. Say YES to Loving Service.
Because that's what it's about - caring, loving, letting that person really matter to you.
Have I mentioned how awesome it is how God answers prayers?
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Pictures of the Place
For those of you who were hoping for an actual post... sorry. I'm just posting some pictures of the townhouse I rent and the vacant room that needs to be filled.
So the pics are kind of in random order, because thats how blogger put them...
This is the laundry room. There's some storage space around the back corner. This is the only part of the basement that doesn't belong to whoever ends up with the room.
This is the closet in the bedroom. It goes really deep underneath the stairs. There are two rods. Nice for putting your out of season clothes in the back.
A view of the bedroom from the back corner, standing in front of the window. The dresser you see is empty right now - just for extra storage. To its right is the stairwell going up into the living room. To its left is the doorway to the bathroom.
A view of the bedroom from the entry next to the stairs/bathroom. As you can see, there is a door going into the back yard (non-fenced), and a nice big window with a fancy steel rod.
This just shows how you come down the stairs and it opens into the bedroom. The last person to live here put up a suspension rod and curtain right in this gap so that she could have a little more privacy. But the only reason anyone else comes downstairs is to use the laundry room.
You guessed it. The bathroom.
And the other side of the bathroom. The mirror opens into a medicine cabinet. In this picture, the door is to the right, and the toilet is to the left.
This is the living room, looking in from the front entryway next to the kitchen. Don't worry, we're getting a couch soon!
The kitchen. You can see how it opens up into the living room behind.
Another view of the kitchen, from the entry way. There is a window on the wall to the right, and the dishwasher and opening into the living room are on the left.
This is the view of the main level from the front door. You can see how there is a little half ledge that runs between the entry way and the kitchen. The stairs going up are to the left.
For those of you who read this blog because you actually know me... No, I didn't move. My roommate did. Yesterday. And we're trying to find someone to take her room.
So the pics are kind of in random order, because thats how blogger put them...
This is the laundry room. There's some storage space around the back corner. This is the only part of the basement that doesn't belong to whoever ends up with the room.
This is the closet in the bedroom. It goes really deep underneath the stairs. There are two rods. Nice for putting your out of season clothes in the back.
A view of the bedroom from the back corner, standing in front of the window. The dresser you see is empty right now - just for extra storage. To its right is the stairwell going up into the living room. To its left is the doorway to the bathroom.
A view of the bedroom from the entry next to the stairs/bathroom. As you can see, there is a door going into the back yard (non-fenced), and a nice big window with a fancy steel rod.
This just shows how you come down the stairs and it opens into the bedroom. The last person to live here put up a suspension rod and curtain right in this gap so that she could have a little more privacy. But the only reason anyone else comes downstairs is to use the laundry room.
You guessed it. The bathroom.
And the other side of the bathroom. The mirror opens into a medicine cabinet. In this picture, the door is to the right, and the toilet is to the left.
This is the living room, looking in from the front entryway next to the kitchen. Don't worry, we're getting a couch soon!
The kitchen. You can see how it opens up into the living room behind.
Another view of the kitchen, from the entry way. There is a window on the wall to the right, and the dishwasher and opening into the living room are on the left.
This is the view of the main level from the front door. You can see how there is a little half ledge that runs between the entry way and the kitchen. The stairs going up are to the left.
For those of you who read this blog because you actually know me... No, I didn't move. My roommate did. Yesterday. And we're trying to find someone to take her room.Sunday, February 28, 2010
Mission 2010: Say YES to Adventures!
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...
Mission 2010: Say YES to Adventures!
1/8/10 - Took an Improv Comedy class at a random school in DC... in front of a boy! It was a date!
1/9/10 - Country dancing in Virginia. Not the same as country dancing in Texas.
1/16/10 - Stood on the Filene Center stage at Wolf Trap and sang an aria. To an audience of one. Actually, two. The security guard was nice enough to let me finish before kindly saying, "You sound really good... but you have to get off the stage."
1/18/10 (Martin Luther King Day) - Attended the MLK Celebration at the National Cathedral. Got down, boogied, and rejoiced with a gospel choir. In a Cathedral. "Busted Loose" with Chuck Brown, the pioneer of the DC gogo movement. In a Cathedral. Put money in the collection plate for Haiti. Ate falafels for the first time (where have you been all my life?!).
1/30/10 - Blizzard. I drove my car in first gear for the first time ever because I couldn't stand staying at home on Saturday night. Went sledding on a cookie sheet down the middle of a steep residential street at 1am.
2/6/10 - Blizzard.
2/10/10 - Blizzard. aka "Snowpocalypse" aka "Snowmageddon." NOT aka "Snowmantic." Okay. Seriously. We don't need any more snow. Thanks.
2/13/10 - Purchased an alcoholic beverage for the first time. To make chili. The recipe calls for "a can of Bud." I've never felt so uncomfortable at the grocery store in my life!
Got a sassy new hair cut - layers layers layers!
Attended a fancy shmancy "mock-tini" party hosted by a very classy friend. There was a real roulette table and hired dealer - for a bunch of Mormons who don't know how to play and don't gamble with real money. The best part: chocolate around the rims of the glasses and an ice sculpture center piece, compliments of blizzards 1-3.
2/14/10 - Slumber party at my house with my 6-year-old niece!
2/15/10 (Presidents Day) - Continue slumber party. Made chili for the first time ever for a work chili cookoff, painted fingernails, read Fancy Nancy books. Got snowed on standing in line to get into George Washington's house at Mount Vernon.
2/16/10 - Did not win the chili cookoff at work, but one of the judges did complain to me about the scoring system, feeling that it was unjust that my delicious chili, which was his second favorite, did not win second place.
2/20/10 - Participated in an Art Therapy assessment, to help a random girl from another ward with a school assignment. Unfortunately, so far she's only learned how to do the assessment, not how to read them. So for all I know I could be a complete psychological mess, but at least I got to draw pretty pictures!
"Argyle Style" 2010. Thats right. The theme of this second annual shindig was ARGYLE. Argyle walls. Argyle cakes. Argyle brownies. Oragami argyle hanging from the ceilings. And of course, argyle sweaters, gloves, socks, scarves, hats, ties, headbands, earrings, shoes... if it comes in argyle, it was there!
2/26/10 - Traveled to a random movie theater in Bethesda, MD to see a 10:00 showing of the political thriller movie, "Ghost Writer". Plot: interesting and thought provoking. Full shot of Ewan McGregor's butt: AWKWARD!!!!!!
2/27/10 - "Harvard Sailing Team," a fun comedy troupe, free at the Kennedy Center.
Amsterdam Falafels experience #2 - just as good as I remembered!
Watched a saucy, dirty, AMAZING blues band, "Lex Gray and the Urban Pioneers" at a spunky joint called Madam's Organ in the famous DC neighborhood of Adam's Morgan. Grabbed the lead singer's bright blue feather boa and snapped a photo with the guitarist:
What other adventures will we have between now and December 31, 2010???? Directing a concert for the Opera Guild of Northern Virginia, New York, Baltimore, an inside tour of Annapolis by a sailor who wants to tune my banjo (no joke), Duck Beach, Shenandoah Valley, Aggie-t.u. football game, California gold country, lighthouse, Palmyra, Embassy Open Houses, Punkin' Chunkin', Cherry Blossom festival.... Just you wait. Shoot, by the end of this maybe I'll even get to meet the President. :)
Mission 2010: Say YES to Adventures!
1/8/10 - Took an Improv Comedy class at a random school in DC... in front of a boy! It was a date!
1/9/10 - Country dancing in Virginia. Not the same as country dancing in Texas.
1/16/10 - Stood on the Filene Center stage at Wolf Trap and sang an aria. To an audience of one. Actually, two. The security guard was nice enough to let me finish before kindly saying, "You sound really good... but you have to get off the stage."
1/18/10 (Martin Luther King Day) - Attended the MLK Celebration at the National Cathedral. Got down, boogied, and rejoiced with a gospel choir. In a Cathedral. "Busted Loose" with Chuck Brown, the pioneer of the DC gogo movement. In a Cathedral. Put money in the collection plate for Haiti. Ate falafels for the first time (where have you been all my life?!).
1/30/10 - Blizzard. I drove my car in first gear for the first time ever because I couldn't stand staying at home on Saturday night. Went sledding on a cookie sheet down the middle of a steep residential street at 1am.
2/6/10 - Blizzard.
2/10/10 - Blizzard. aka "Snowpocalypse" aka "Snowmageddon." NOT aka "Snowmantic." Okay. Seriously. We don't need any more snow. Thanks.
2/13/10 - Purchased an alcoholic beverage for the first time. To make chili. The recipe calls for "a can of Bud." I've never felt so uncomfortable at the grocery store in my life!
Got a sassy new hair cut - layers layers layers!
Attended a fancy shmancy "mock-tini" party hosted by a very classy friend. There was a real roulette table and hired dealer - for a bunch of Mormons who don't know how to play and don't gamble with real money. The best part: chocolate around the rims of the glasses and an ice sculpture center piece, compliments of blizzards 1-3.
2/14/10 - Slumber party at my house with my 6-year-old niece!
2/15/10 (Presidents Day) - Continue slumber party. Made chili for the first time ever for a work chili cookoff, painted fingernails, read Fancy Nancy books. Got snowed on standing in line to get into George Washington's house at Mount Vernon.
2/16/10 - Did not win the chili cookoff at work, but one of the judges did complain to me about the scoring system, feeling that it was unjust that my delicious chili, which was his second favorite, did not win second place.
2/20/10 - Participated in an Art Therapy assessment, to help a random girl from another ward with a school assignment. Unfortunately, so far she's only learned how to do the assessment, not how to read them. So for all I know I could be a complete psychological mess, but at least I got to draw pretty pictures!
"Argyle Style" 2010. Thats right. The theme of this second annual shindig was ARGYLE. Argyle walls. Argyle cakes. Argyle brownies. Oragami argyle hanging from the ceilings. And of course, argyle sweaters, gloves, socks, scarves, hats, ties, headbands, earrings, shoes... if it comes in argyle, it was there!
2/26/10 - Traveled to a random movie theater in Bethesda, MD to see a 10:00 showing of the political thriller movie, "Ghost Writer". Plot: interesting and thought provoking. Full shot of Ewan McGregor's butt: AWKWARD!!!!!!
2/27/10 - "Harvard Sailing Team," a fun comedy troupe, free at the Kennedy Center.
Amsterdam Falafels experience #2 - just as good as I remembered!
Watched a saucy, dirty, AMAZING blues band, "Lex Gray and the Urban Pioneers" at a spunky joint called Madam's Organ in the famous DC neighborhood of Adam's Morgan. Grabbed the lead singer's bright blue feather boa and snapped a photo with the guitarist:
Saturday, January 2, 2010
A Lifelong Walk Side by Side
I was headed that direction anyway and nothing else was on the agenda for this bone-chilling cold Saturday afternoon, so I decided at the last minute to "stop by" the temple for a perfectly unrushed and unimposed-upon endowment session. And how wonderful it was! I can't think of a better way to start a new year than in The House of the Lord. There wasn't anything in particular on my mind. I just went, and listened, and felt, and it was wonderful. Some think its weird, but I love to go to the temple alone. There is no one to distract me from my own contemplation and communion with the Lord, and I don't have to feel the slightest rush to get up and leave that holy place where I love to be so much.
I've never been one to set New Years Resolutions per say, because I have always been one to set goals as needed, no matter the time of year. But I do enjoy looking back periodically to ponder the Lord's hand in my life, and I'm always amazed when I do. As I sat in the temple today I pondered my 2009: joy and sadness, pleasure and pain, miracles, healing, progress, change. I'm so grateful for where 2009 took me, or rather, where my Father in Heaven took me.
Thats what struck me as I pondered 2009 in the temple today. I realized that my life has been a great walk side by side with my Savior. He walks with me, and I choose to walk with Him. On multiple occasions in the past year I have been in a state where I knew a very important and potentially life-altering decision was before me, and I simply didn't know which way to go. For days, weeks, and sometimes even months, I prayed and pled with the Father to show me the way, help me make the right decision. That was me choosing to walk with my Savior. By staying close by His side He led me along in the right path, even when I couldn't see what was ahead.
I believe that when we choose to walk with the Savior, our path is safe and our future is sure. I know that my Father in Heaven would have me do great things for Him during my life on earth - specific things that only He-and maybe a few others up there-know. Even though I don't know what those things are, I know that I will accomplish them as long as I continue to walk with Him.
"O that thou hadst hearkened to my commandments! then had thy peace been as a river, and thy righteousness as the waves of the sea" (Isaiah 48:18). That means that when we do hearken to His commandments, our peace is as steady as a river, and we can attain unto righteousness that is as constant and eternal as the ever flowing waves of the sea.
Keep walking with Him. You might say that's my lifetime resolution.
I've never been one to set New Years Resolutions per say, because I have always been one to set goals as needed, no matter the time of year. But I do enjoy looking back periodically to ponder the Lord's hand in my life, and I'm always amazed when I do. As I sat in the temple today I pondered my 2009: joy and sadness, pleasure and pain, miracles, healing, progress, change. I'm so grateful for where 2009 took me, or rather, where my Father in Heaven took me.
Thats what struck me as I pondered 2009 in the temple today. I realized that my life has been a great walk side by side with my Savior. He walks with me, and I choose to walk with Him. On multiple occasions in the past year I have been in a state where I knew a very important and potentially life-altering decision was before me, and I simply didn't know which way to go. For days, weeks, and sometimes even months, I prayed and pled with the Father to show me the way, help me make the right decision. That was me choosing to walk with my Savior. By staying close by His side He led me along in the right path, even when I couldn't see what was ahead.
I believe that when we choose to walk with the Savior, our path is safe and our future is sure. I know that my Father in Heaven would have me do great things for Him during my life on earth - specific things that only He-and maybe a few others up there-know. Even though I don't know what those things are, I know that I will accomplish them as long as I continue to walk with Him.
"O that thou hadst hearkened to my commandments! then had thy peace been as a river, and thy righteousness as the waves of the sea" (Isaiah 48:18). That means that when we do hearken to His commandments, our peace is as steady as a river, and we can attain unto righteousness that is as constant and eternal as the ever flowing waves of the sea.
Keep walking with Him. You might say that's my lifetime resolution.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
A True Miracle
This time one year ago Brant and I were in the middle of a two-week halt of all things wedding, at the wise suggestion of my mother, in hopes of figuring things out, or recovering, or something like that (the real reason is a little unclear, since it was later learned that we both had very differing ideas about the purpose of that 2 week hiatus). That led to the wedding being "postponed," and then finally canceled for good. There were many songs that related in one way or another to how I felt at the end of our relationship , but the one that will probably always be my "Brant Breakup Theme Song" is Better in Time by Leona Lewis.
Thought I couldn't live without you.
Its gonna hurt when it heals to.
All I know is it will all get better in time.
And it did.
Tonight I realized that Heavenly Father has mercifully worked a great and true miracle. He healed me. In less than a year. When I think about Brant, it doesn't hurt. In fact, I don't think about him much at all. I'm not haunted by countless unanswered questions and insecurities - and believe me I was left with plenty after what I thought was going to last forever came painfully crashing down. Heavenly Father mercifully, and quickly, taught me, gave me answers to my questions, and healed me. That is a true miracle.
The line "Its gonna hurt when it heals too" is still true. If I were to really think about it in depth and replay certain scenes in my head, I would feel it. But I actually find it very difficult to even do that. The memories are there, but its like there is a veil in my mind that makes them sort of fuzzy and hard to reach. The scars are real, but scars is all they are - a new part of me that will always be there as a reminder of past pain, but no longer bleeding, no longer painful.
I could go on and describe specific evidences of Heavenly Father's mercy and love in all of this, but I don't feel like this is the place for that. But trust me, there are plenty and they are real. Its hard for me to even comprehend how much He must love me to take care of me like He has.
Thought I couldn't live without you.
Its gonna hurt when it heals to.
All I know is it will all get better in time.
And it did.
Tonight I realized that Heavenly Father has mercifully worked a great and true miracle. He healed me. In less than a year. When I think about Brant, it doesn't hurt. In fact, I don't think about him much at all. I'm not haunted by countless unanswered questions and insecurities - and believe me I was left with plenty after what I thought was going to last forever came painfully crashing down. Heavenly Father mercifully, and quickly, taught me, gave me answers to my questions, and healed me. That is a true miracle.
The line "Its gonna hurt when it heals too" is still true. If I were to really think about it in depth and replay certain scenes in my head, I would feel it. But I actually find it very difficult to even do that. The memories are there, but its like there is a veil in my mind that makes them sort of fuzzy and hard to reach. The scars are real, but scars is all they are - a new part of me that will always be there as a reminder of past pain, but no longer bleeding, no longer painful.
I could go on and describe specific evidences of Heavenly Father's mercy and love in all of this, but I don't feel like this is the place for that. But trust me, there are plenty and they are real. Its hard for me to even comprehend how much He must love me to take care of me like He has.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Finished!
Finals are over! This crazy semester is over! I did it! I survived! And I think it turned out pretty good!
After a good scare with one of my classes involving a very misleading grading system, I feel confident that despite this being the heaviest load I've ever taken, I somehow managed to keep my GPA right up where I want it. Both semesters this year have ended with me in absolute awe at how the Lord has taken care of me and gotten me through it. I feel that my final grades really are miraculous. I don't know how I did it. I know that the Lord blesses those who put him first and serve him, but I've felt so many times this year like I haven't served him enough. But still he blesses me. I'm truly amazed.
My life this school year has been a roller coaster to say the least. In a matter of months - perhaps even weeks - I experienced some of the happiest moments and some of the most difficult of my life. I felt exhaustion of body, mind, and spirit like I didn't know was possible. I had the life sucked out of me and it took all my strength to painfully take it back. I can't even begin to measure the lessons I learned. Most of them I still haven't figured out how to fabricate into words, and many of them I don't think I've even realized yet. I found myself amazed at the love shown to me by my family and friends, and I learned what love isn't. I felt that I became disconnected from those I serve for a time, but then, miraculously, I learned that I still made a difference. I finally got my very own paid-my-tithing-and-got-a-miracle story! I learned how to find the right road to make things happen in the performing arts world. I got to honor a lost friend and feel a special closeness to her from beyond the veil. I gained new confidence in myself in a lot of areas, but sadly lost it in other areas and I'm still trying to recover from that. The list could go on and on. I can't begin to describe the year its been. I'm relieved that its over, but more so I am amazed that Heavenly Father got me through it. I didn't do it myself. I couldn't have.
Up next: Two and a half weeks of full-time working and intense job searching, followed by an easy peasy five-week summer term, and then... heaven only knows (literally)!
After a good scare with one of my classes involving a very misleading grading system, I feel confident that despite this being the heaviest load I've ever taken, I somehow managed to keep my GPA right up where I want it. Both semesters this year have ended with me in absolute awe at how the Lord has taken care of me and gotten me through it. I feel that my final grades really are miraculous. I don't know how I did it. I know that the Lord blesses those who put him first and serve him, but I've felt so many times this year like I haven't served him enough. But still he blesses me. I'm truly amazed.
My life this school year has been a roller coaster to say the least. In a matter of months - perhaps even weeks - I experienced some of the happiest moments and some of the most difficult of my life. I felt exhaustion of body, mind, and spirit like I didn't know was possible. I had the life sucked out of me and it took all my strength to painfully take it back. I can't even begin to measure the lessons I learned. Most of them I still haven't figured out how to fabricate into words, and many of them I don't think I've even realized yet. I found myself amazed at the love shown to me by my family and friends, and I learned what love isn't. I felt that I became disconnected from those I serve for a time, but then, miraculously, I learned that I still made a difference. I finally got my very own paid-my-tithing-and-got-a-miracle story! I learned how to find the right road to make things happen in the performing arts world. I got to honor a lost friend and feel a special closeness to her from beyond the veil. I gained new confidence in myself in a lot of areas, but sadly lost it in other areas and I'm still trying to recover from that. The list could go on and on. I can't begin to describe the year its been. I'm relieved that its over, but more so I am amazed that Heavenly Father got me through it. I didn't do it myself. I couldn't have.
Up next: Two and a half weeks of full-time working and intense job searching, followed by an easy peasy five-week summer term, and then... heaven only knows (literally)!
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Random Updates
First of all, aren't you proud of me? I'm blogging! I decided there's a lot going on in my life and I should jump on a quiet Sunday evening to fill in my faithful and deprived followers.
In three months I will be done with school. FOREVER! On July 2nd I will take my last final EVER! It brings joy to the very depths of my soul just to think of it. I'm already scheming all the ways I will fill up my time doing things I want to do, not things my professors want me to do. This current semester might kill me yet, but once I get through it the worst will definitely be over. All I'll have left is Yoga and Art History - both classes I'm very excited about. I'll take them both in the first five-week summer term, but I won't technically graduate until August 15th. I'm hoping to move away from College Station and find a job right after finishing classes in July and take a trip back to walk the stage in August.
On that note, I'm looking for a job. I'd be happy with anything in the performing arts, but would ideally like to be at an opera company in either the Artistic or Education departments. Ideal locations are anywhere in Texas, Virginia/DC area, or close to siblings, but I'll go wherever I get hired. I've applied for a couple positions, but I'm at a major disadvantage at this point because I can't start immediately. Also, its a hard time for the arts (and nonprofits in general, for that matter). People have less to give, and opera companies rely on gifts for around 70% of their budget. The company I interned with is on a hiring freeze or else I would have a very good chance of going to work there. I'm hoping and praying to have a job lined up as soon as I graduate. I feel very strongly that it is time for me to get out of College Station.
As far as the present, I am definitely in race-to-the-finish mode. My Senior Project culminates two weeks from tomorrow with the concert I'm organizing start to finish: "A Celebration of Mary Beth Farmer." Mary Beth was a close friend of mine and fellow Music major who was killed shortly after graduating last spring. The concert will feature performances by faculty and students of the department who have volunteered to participate (including me). The program has shaped up very nicely and I'm confident it will suit its purpose perfectly and be well attended. However, I have a lot of work left to do and the clock is ticking! On top of that, I have papers, projects, reading, tests, and a somewhat absurd amount of church activities. Am I going to sleep in April? All signs point to not much.
On a high note, I get my Aggie Ring in 12 days! People who aren't familiar with the tradition might think its weird to be so excited about getting a college class ring, but anyone who knows anything about the Aggies knows that the Aggie ring is a big deal! Its a symbol of Aggie values and unites the Aggie family throughout the world throughout their lives. An unofficial tradition is to "earn your right" to wear the ring by "dunking" it in a pitcher of beer and chugging it until you catch the ring in your teeth. Of course I won't be chugging any beer, but we Mormon kids have our own little tradition of trying to come up with the most creative substitute. My roommate is getting her ring the same day as me, and we have decided we will dunk ours together in Martinelli's - sparkling apple for me, and sparkling grade for Heather. My mom is even coming to witness the festivities and stay for parents weekend and through to the concert. I'm so excited! Of course, that means I have to finish all my homework early because I won't be doing any that weekend!
I've started a container garden and I'm really enjoying it. So far I have rosemary, garlic chives, a banana pepper, and a tomatoe plant that technically belongs to my roommate. I also planted lavender although all sources I've consulted say it probably won't grow. I also got a venus fly trap for my kitchen. Spearmint grows wild in the lawn outside my apartment, so I plan on stealing a few sprigs to take with me when I leave. I'm trying not to go too crazy since I'm moving soon, but its just so fun!
I could go on, but thats probably enough update for one post. Bed time.
In three months I will be done with school. FOREVER! On July 2nd I will take my last final EVER! It brings joy to the very depths of my soul just to think of it. I'm already scheming all the ways I will fill up my time doing things I want to do, not things my professors want me to do. This current semester might kill me yet, but once I get through it the worst will definitely be over. All I'll have left is Yoga and Art History - both classes I'm very excited about. I'll take them both in the first five-week summer term, but I won't technically graduate until August 15th. I'm hoping to move away from College Station and find a job right after finishing classes in July and take a trip back to walk the stage in August.
On that note, I'm looking for a job. I'd be happy with anything in the performing arts, but would ideally like to be at an opera company in either the Artistic or Education departments. Ideal locations are anywhere in Texas, Virginia/DC area, or close to siblings, but I'll go wherever I get hired. I've applied for a couple positions, but I'm at a major disadvantage at this point because I can't start immediately. Also, its a hard time for the arts (and nonprofits in general, for that matter). People have less to give, and opera companies rely on gifts for around 70% of their budget. The company I interned with is on a hiring freeze or else I would have a very good chance of going to work there. I'm hoping and praying to have a job lined up as soon as I graduate. I feel very strongly that it is time for me to get out of College Station.
As far as the present, I am definitely in race-to-the-finish mode. My Senior Project culminates two weeks from tomorrow with the concert I'm organizing start to finish: "A Celebration of Mary Beth Farmer." Mary Beth was a close friend of mine and fellow Music major who was killed shortly after graduating last spring. The concert will feature performances by faculty and students of the department who have volunteered to participate (including me). The program has shaped up very nicely and I'm confident it will suit its purpose perfectly and be well attended. However, I have a lot of work left to do and the clock is ticking! On top of that, I have papers, projects, reading, tests, and a somewhat absurd amount of church activities. Am I going to sleep in April? All signs point to not much.
On a high note, I get my Aggie Ring in 12 days! People who aren't familiar with the tradition might think its weird to be so excited about getting a college class ring, but anyone who knows anything about the Aggies knows that the Aggie ring is a big deal! Its a symbol of Aggie values and unites the Aggie family throughout the world throughout their lives. An unofficial tradition is to "earn your right" to wear the ring by "dunking" it in a pitcher of beer and chugging it until you catch the ring in your teeth. Of course I won't be chugging any beer, but we Mormon kids have our own little tradition of trying to come up with the most creative substitute. My roommate is getting her ring the same day as me, and we have decided we will dunk ours together in Martinelli's - sparkling apple for me, and sparkling grade for Heather. My mom is even coming to witness the festivities and stay for parents weekend and through to the concert. I'm so excited! Of course, that means I have to finish all my homework early because I won't be doing any that weekend!
I've started a container garden and I'm really enjoying it. So far I have rosemary, garlic chives, a banana pepper, and a tomatoe plant that technically belongs to my roommate. I also planted lavender although all sources I've consulted say it probably won't grow. I also got a venus fly trap for my kitchen. Spearmint grows wild in the lawn outside my apartment, so I plan on stealing a few sprigs to take with me when I leave. I'm trying not to go too crazy since I'm moving soon, but its just so fun!
I could go on, but thats probably enough update for one post. Bed time.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Happy Birthday Mom!
Both of my sisters dedicated blog posts to my mom today (its her birthday). I figured I should follow suit, but I don't have any cute kids to show off like they do. However, I know one thing mom always wants from me...
Seriously, I can't believe I'm posting this on the internet. I LOVE YOU MOM!
Seriously, I can't believe I'm posting this on the internet. I LOVE YOU MOM!
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Facebook Game
I got roped into playing this game on facebook where you write 25 random things about yourself, then tag 25 of your friends, and they have to do the same thing. It seemed like a good thing to put on the blog too.
1. I'm very busy, and can't believe I'm actually spending time doing this right now. But someone asked me to, and then I started thinking about it, and then there was no going back. Once something gets into my head its better for me to just get it out of my head. Otherwise it will rattle around in there and drive me nuts.
2. I am a Texas Aggie through and through. You may think some of the traditions are dumb, but I think they're fun! Hullabaloo Caneck Caneck, Gig em! and WHOOP!!!,
3. I absolutely love opera and consider it the ultimate culminating art form. My favorite opera I've ever seen was Handel's Tamerlano at Washington National Opera. The music, singing, costumes, everything was absolutely beautiful. I had "standing room only" seats, so I had to stand in the back where the only way I could see the supertitles (translation) was by crouching over. By the end of the 3-hour opera I felt like I'd just been to an Aggie football game- completely worn out and tired from standing and bending for so long, but totally pumped up because IT WAS FREAKIN' AWESOME!
4. There's only one guy who's ever had enough of me to break my heart, and he's done it three times- the last after he had asked me to marry him. Trust me, he will NOT being doing it again.
5. I am completely addicted to Gilmore Girls, and feel that there is no other TV show that even compares to its greatness. One of my favorite things to do on Saturday morning is wake up and watch Gilmore Girls in my PJ's like its Saturday morning cartoons.
6. I've worked at a staffing service called Express Employment Professionals for waaaaaaay too long. Four and a half years if you add together the time before and after my mission. I really loved it for the first couple years, but now I feel like it is slowly crushing my soul. Can we say burn out?
7. I really really want to go work in the administrative offices for an opera company after I graduate in July. I don't really care what I actually do for them, I just love being in that environment and want the experience. However, what I really want my life's work to be is raising my children in my home. After they are all grown and moved away I'll go work in opera again. Unless by some chance I'm rich by then. In that case I would become an arts advocate and join the board of directors of some fabulous opera company and give them obscene amounts of money for the sake of the art.
8. I am the Relief Society President for my congregation at church. That means I am responsible for the spiritual and temporal welfare of all the women in my congregation. It is exhausting and difficult at times, and I often don't feel like I do a good enough job, but I love it. I love knowing everyone and having a perfectly good excuse to care about them and serve them, and I love seeing people's lives get better because of Jesus Christ.
9. Up until about two years ago, my dream in life was always to become a famous country singer, and I absolutely planned on doing it. Then one day at work one of my coworkers was talking about how sick her four-month-old baby was that she had just dropped off at the daycare. At that very moment I realized that it didn't matter what I had to give up- I NEVER wanted to have to put my children in a daycare. I would be the one to raise them and care for them. Thats when I decided I was not going to be a professional singer.
10. When I was 8 I started collecting little porcelain clown figurines. Today I have thirty something, including one Lladro that is absolutely beautiful. I'm really really freaked out by clowns in real life, so I promise all of mine are pretty and not scary.
11. Not a single aspect of my life has actually worked out the way I planned it would when I graduated high school. In fact, not a single significant plan that I've ever made for myself has actually happened the way I planned. Heavenly Father always has other, better things in mind for me. I don't even know why I make plans any more.
12. I don't know how many times I've been accused of being an exact clone of my mother. I think my mom's pretty amazing, so it doesn't bother me at all.
13. My dream car has always been a Dodge Ram truck with nice big tires and a lift. I guess I have little man syndrome or something.
14. My fingers naturally curl outward at the tips. A lot of people find it a little freaky.
15. Quesadillas are the crutch and staple of my diet.
16. I have pretty high standards when it comes to how I like to be asked out on a date. Don't even think about asking me out via text or facebook, and I'd recommend not beginning with, "So what are you doing on...?". You're just setting yourself up for rejection. I'm pretty busy, so I probably already have plans that day, but if I like you I'll change them.
17. I don't like olives, pickles, mustard, or pork. However, I absolutely abhor hot dogs and this Croatian dish called sarma that my grandma used to make.
18. I always thought my favorite color was green until a few years ago when I started realizing that maybe I like pink better. I've been in an identity crisis ever since.
19. I met Ruben Studdard last summer while I was working backstage at the Kennedy Center in DC. He mostly kept to himself, but he brought his old friend Alvin with him. Alvin and I became friends, and he talked Ruben into taking a picture with me. However, I look like a total dork in the picture because Alvin was making me laugh. He gave me his card and I felt special.
20. My most memorable concert experience is when I went to see Brooks & Dunn at Fair Park in Dallas with my mom when I was in fifth or sixth grade. It started raining about the time we pulled into the parking lot in our little Geo Metro. We decided to stay in the car until the rain passed, thinking it would just be a quick storm. Hours later we were still sitting there in the parking lot watching other cars float by. Luckily the storm caused some kind of technical difficulties with the concert, and they rescheduled it for a few weeks later.
21. Jacob is my favorite Book of Mormon prophet. I think I relate to him because we have a very similar manner of teaching the gospel. I especially love his sermon in 2 Nephi 9. You can just feel him getting more and more excited as he teaches about the Atonement, and he explains things so clearly and with so much love for the people he's speaking to.
22. The Celestial Room of the temple is my absolute favorite place in the whole wide world, and I'm not just saying that.
23. I have this thing about looking pretty for church on Sunday. It makes me feel happy. I love getting to wear a pretty dress and do my hair nice and not have to worry about it getting messed up, because I'm just going to be sitting in church! You might think I'm doing it for someone else, but I'm not. I often start thinking about what I'm going to wear to church the next day on Saturday night.
24. When I was little my siblings started calling my Toadie, after the littlest ogre on the cartoon Gummy Bears. You see, I was the littlest ogre in our clan. One of my sisters still calls me Toad on a regular basis.
25. My old mission companion Athena and I have been in a poking war on facebook for over a year. We poke each other back and forth often multiple times a day. Its completely pointless and insane, but we're both too stubborn to stop, so it will probably go on until one of us dies.
1. I'm very busy, and can't believe I'm actually spending time doing this right now. But someone asked me to, and then I started thinking about it, and then there was no going back. Once something gets into my head its better for me to just get it out of my head. Otherwise it will rattle around in there and drive me nuts.
2. I am a Texas Aggie through and through. You may think some of the traditions are dumb, but I think they're fun! Hullabaloo Caneck Caneck, Gig em! and WHOOP!!!,
3. I absolutely love opera and consider it the ultimate culminating art form. My favorite opera I've ever seen was Handel's Tamerlano at Washington National Opera. The music, singing, costumes, everything was absolutely beautiful. I had "standing room only" seats, so I had to stand in the back where the only way I could see the supertitles (translation) was by crouching over. By the end of the 3-hour opera I felt like I'd just been to an Aggie football game- completely worn out and tired from standing and bending for so long, but totally pumped up because IT WAS FREAKIN' AWESOME!
4. There's only one guy who's ever had enough of me to break my heart, and he's done it three times- the last after he had asked me to marry him. Trust me, he will NOT being doing it again.
5. I am completely addicted to Gilmore Girls, and feel that there is no other TV show that even compares to its greatness. One of my favorite things to do on Saturday morning is wake up and watch Gilmore Girls in my PJ's like its Saturday morning cartoons.
6. I've worked at a staffing service called Express Employment Professionals for waaaaaaay too long. Four and a half years if you add together the time before and after my mission. I really loved it for the first couple years, but now I feel like it is slowly crushing my soul. Can we say burn out?
7. I really really want to go work in the administrative offices for an opera company after I graduate in July. I don't really care what I actually do for them, I just love being in that environment and want the experience. However, what I really want my life's work to be is raising my children in my home. After they are all grown and moved away I'll go work in opera again. Unless by some chance I'm rich by then. In that case I would become an arts advocate and join the board of directors of some fabulous opera company and give them obscene amounts of money for the sake of the art.
8. I am the Relief Society President for my congregation at church. That means I am responsible for the spiritual and temporal welfare of all the women in my congregation. It is exhausting and difficult at times, and I often don't feel like I do a good enough job, but I love it. I love knowing everyone and having a perfectly good excuse to care about them and serve them, and I love seeing people's lives get better because of Jesus Christ.
9. Up until about two years ago, my dream in life was always to become a famous country singer, and I absolutely planned on doing it. Then one day at work one of my coworkers was talking about how sick her four-month-old baby was that she had just dropped off at the daycare. At that very moment I realized that it didn't matter what I had to give up- I NEVER wanted to have to put my children in a daycare. I would be the one to raise them and care for them. Thats when I decided I was not going to be a professional singer.
10. When I was 8 I started collecting little porcelain clown figurines. Today I have thirty something, including one Lladro that is absolutely beautiful. I'm really really freaked out by clowns in real life, so I promise all of mine are pretty and not scary.
11. Not a single aspect of my life has actually worked out the way I planned it would when I graduated high school. In fact, not a single significant plan that I've ever made for myself has actually happened the way I planned. Heavenly Father always has other, better things in mind for me. I don't even know why I make plans any more.
12. I don't know how many times I've been accused of being an exact clone of my mother. I think my mom's pretty amazing, so it doesn't bother me at all.
13. My dream car has always been a Dodge Ram truck with nice big tires and a lift. I guess I have little man syndrome or something.
14. My fingers naturally curl outward at the tips. A lot of people find it a little freaky.
15. Quesadillas are the crutch and staple of my diet.
16. I have pretty high standards when it comes to how I like to be asked out on a date. Don't even think about asking me out via text or facebook, and I'd recommend not beginning with, "So what are you doing on...?". You're just setting yourself up for rejection. I'm pretty busy, so I probably already have plans that day, but if I like you I'll change them.
17. I don't like olives, pickles, mustard, or pork. However, I absolutely abhor hot dogs and this Croatian dish called sarma that my grandma used to make.
18. I always thought my favorite color was green until a few years ago when I started realizing that maybe I like pink better. I've been in an identity crisis ever since.
19. I met Ruben Studdard last summer while I was working backstage at the Kennedy Center in DC. He mostly kept to himself, but he brought his old friend Alvin with him. Alvin and I became friends, and he talked Ruben into taking a picture with me. However, I look like a total dork in the picture because Alvin was making me laugh. He gave me his card and I felt special.
20. My most memorable concert experience is when I went to see Brooks & Dunn at Fair Park in Dallas with my mom when I was in fifth or sixth grade. It started raining about the time we pulled into the parking lot in our little Geo Metro. We decided to stay in the car until the rain passed, thinking it would just be a quick storm. Hours later we were still sitting there in the parking lot watching other cars float by. Luckily the storm caused some kind of technical difficulties with the concert, and they rescheduled it for a few weeks later.
21. Jacob is my favorite Book of Mormon prophet. I think I relate to him because we have a very similar manner of teaching the gospel. I especially love his sermon in 2 Nephi 9. You can just feel him getting more and more excited as he teaches about the Atonement, and he explains things so clearly and with so much love for the people he's speaking to.
22. The Celestial Room of the temple is my absolute favorite place in the whole wide world, and I'm not just saying that.
23. I have this thing about looking pretty for church on Sunday. It makes me feel happy. I love getting to wear a pretty dress and do my hair nice and not have to worry about it getting messed up, because I'm just going to be sitting in church! You might think I'm doing it for someone else, but I'm not. I often start thinking about what I'm going to wear to church the next day on Saturday night.
24. When I was little my siblings started calling my Toadie, after the littlest ogre on the cartoon Gummy Bears. You see, I was the littlest ogre in our clan. One of my sisters still calls me Toad on a regular basis.
25. My old mission companion Athena and I have been in a poking war on facebook for over a year. We poke each other back and forth often multiple times a day. Its completely pointless and insane, but we're both too stubborn to stop, so it will probably go on until one of us dies.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Doing just fine...
Songs that in some way describe how I've recently felt (ordered somewhat in priority):
One Step Closer - Wade Bowen
Leave the Pieces - the Wreckers (like... wow.)
Don't Make Me - Blake Shelton
White Horse - Taylor Swift
Better in Time - Leona Lewis
Hot N Cold - Katy Perry (the music video is really funny, pardon the one bad word at the beginning of the song)
Better off Wrong - Randy Rogers Band
Kerosene - Miranda Lambert (lines from this song actually used in recent conversation. Ignore the video though, I don't really like it.)
In The End -Lincoln Park
How Far - Martina McBride
Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis
If It Don't Come Easy - Tanya Tucker
I'm Not Loving Anymore - Kevin Fowler
Any others?
...Everyone knows I'm one of those people that can't hear a song without relating to it, right? :)
P.S. The story (see previous post) will be finished in my journal, but not for the public.
One Step Closer - Wade Bowen
Leave the Pieces - the Wreckers (like... wow.)
Don't Make Me - Blake Shelton
White Horse - Taylor Swift
Better in Time - Leona Lewis
Hot N Cold - Katy Perry (the music video is really funny, pardon the one bad word at the beginning of the song)
Better off Wrong - Randy Rogers Band
Kerosene - Miranda Lambert (lines from this song actually used in recent conversation. Ignore the video though, I don't really like it.)
In The End -Lincoln Park
How Far - Martina McBride
Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis
If It Don't Come Easy - Tanya Tucker
I'm Not Loving Anymore - Kevin Fowler
Any others?
...Everyone knows I'm one of those people that can't hear a song without relating to it, right? :)
P.S. The story (see previous post) will be finished in my journal, but not for the public.
Monday, December 15, 2008
The Story (Segment 1)
I've been meaning to do this for a while, and now that school is over I finally have some time. Its a long, long story, and there are parts that even I don't believe! Here is the mild beginning...
Part I – The Early Years
I guess we technically met in 2003, but I’m not sure if we ever actually talked then. I moved to College Station and into the Bryan University Ward for the first time in January. Brant had been there for years. Actually, he’d lived in Bryan his whole life. But, he had a girlfriend at the time I arrived and I wasted no time in going after another interest (that would be Cash, for those of you trying to figure out the reference). We were only in the ward together for a few months before Brant left on his mission. Brant’s most vivid memory of me during this time period happened when he was sitting behind me in Sunday school and I was sitting next to Cash. Apparently Cash was trying to hold my hand, but I was very determined to pay attention to the lesson, not him. At one point I impatiently turned and gave Cash a very stern look after which he ceased all attempts at physical contact for the remainder of the lesson. Apparently Brant was very impressed. I, on the other hand, only have one vague memory of Brant during this time, and that was the day of his mission farewell in March or April. I was surprised to learn he was going on a mission for two reasons – he looked much older than a 19-year-old, and he had a girlfriend!
Part II – Setting the Stage
The next time I saw Brant was three years later. I had been home from my mission for about a month and taken a trip to College Station to see old friends and find a place to live. I planned on moving back a few weeks later. I went to the ward on Sunday and was sitting on the left edge of a center pew. When Brant walked up to hand me the sacrament tray our eyes met for a brief moment and he broke into that beautiful, shy half smile that still melts me to pieces every time. There was something about his deep brown eyes and dark mysterious complexion that intrigued me. I didn’t know a thing about him, but I wanted to go out with him. At some point during that day I found out his name. I also found out that he was the Ward Mission Leader. Perfect, I thought. Being a newly returned missionary the chances of my being called to the ward mission were very high – the perfect setting to get to know each other and maybe – just maybe – I might even catch his eye.
My hopes were partially fulfilled when shortly after my moving back to the ward I was indeed called as a Ward Missionary. Only one problem – somewhere in the weeks since our last meeting Brant had started dating someone else. It was torture! I felt so guilty! We were spending time together at least once a week in our callings, and it was so easy to flirt with him! I became increasingly confident in my opinion that if we could only go out a time or two we surely would discover that we’re perfect for each other! I also was developing quite a strong opinion that the girl he was dating at the time was not right for him. Even the sister missionaries serving in the ward at the time agreed that we were perfect for each other! Why couldn’t he see it?!
After a couple months things did end between him and the “other girl” (who, by the way, is a dear friend of mine. I have nothing against her. I just honestly didn’t think they were right for each other). For a brief time I thought I would finally have my chance. But my hopes proved false once again when I learned he had reconvened an old relationship with a girl in another state. Soon he was released as Ward Mission Leader and as the months went on I gave up hope of ever getting to date him. The girl from out of state came to visit a couple times and I even met her and thought she was a wonderful person. By the end of the year Brant and I only chatted occasionally at church and I was expecting to hear any day that he was engaged.
Tune in next time as the plot thickens in Part III - The Preliminaries!
The Long, Exciting, Often Difficult, Always Crazy Story of
Ruthie and Brant
(as told from Ruthie’s extremely unbiased perspective)
Ruthie and Brant
(as told from Ruthie’s extremely unbiased perspective)
Part I – The Early Years
I guess we technically met in 2003, but I’m not sure if we ever actually talked then. I moved to College Station and into the Bryan University Ward for the first time in January. Brant had been there for years. Actually, he’d lived in Bryan his whole life. But, he had a girlfriend at the time I arrived and I wasted no time in going after another interest (that would be Cash, for those of you trying to figure out the reference). We were only in the ward together for a few months before Brant left on his mission. Brant’s most vivid memory of me during this time period happened when he was sitting behind me in Sunday school and I was sitting next to Cash. Apparently Cash was trying to hold my hand, but I was very determined to pay attention to the lesson, not him. At one point I impatiently turned and gave Cash a very stern look after which he ceased all attempts at physical contact for the remainder of the lesson. Apparently Brant was very impressed. I, on the other hand, only have one vague memory of Brant during this time, and that was the day of his mission farewell in March or April. I was surprised to learn he was going on a mission for two reasons – he looked much older than a 19-year-old, and he had a girlfriend!
Part II – Setting the Stage
The next time I saw Brant was three years later. I had been home from my mission for about a month and taken a trip to College Station to see old friends and find a place to live. I planned on moving back a few weeks later. I went to the ward on Sunday and was sitting on the left edge of a center pew. When Brant walked up to hand me the sacrament tray our eyes met for a brief moment and he broke into that beautiful, shy half smile that still melts me to pieces every time. There was something about his deep brown eyes and dark mysterious complexion that intrigued me. I didn’t know a thing about him, but I wanted to go out with him. At some point during that day I found out his name. I also found out that he was the Ward Mission Leader. Perfect, I thought. Being a newly returned missionary the chances of my being called to the ward mission were very high – the perfect setting to get to know each other and maybe – just maybe – I might even catch his eye.
My hopes were partially fulfilled when shortly after my moving back to the ward I was indeed called as a Ward Missionary. Only one problem – somewhere in the weeks since our last meeting Brant had started dating someone else. It was torture! I felt so guilty! We were spending time together at least once a week in our callings, and it was so easy to flirt with him! I became increasingly confident in my opinion that if we could only go out a time or two we surely would discover that we’re perfect for each other! I also was developing quite a strong opinion that the girl he was dating at the time was not right for him. Even the sister missionaries serving in the ward at the time agreed that we were perfect for each other! Why couldn’t he see it?!
After a couple months things did end between him and the “other girl” (who, by the way, is a dear friend of mine. I have nothing against her. I just honestly didn’t think they were right for each other). For a brief time I thought I would finally have my chance. But my hopes proved false once again when I learned he had reconvened an old relationship with a girl in another state. Soon he was released as Ward Mission Leader and as the months went on I gave up hope of ever getting to date him. The girl from out of state came to visit a couple times and I even met her and thought she was a wonderful person. By the end of the year Brant and I only chatted occasionally at church and I was expecting to hear any day that he was engaged.
Tune in next time as the plot thickens in Part III - The Preliminaries!
Sunday, September 14, 2008
Opening Night
I had the amazing opportunity to fly back to DC this weekend for Washington National Opera's 08-09 Season Opening Night festivities. The opera itself was amazing. La Traviata is an extremely popular opera. Even if you're not an opera person you would have recognized half the songs because they are used in commercials and movies so much. La Traviata is actually the opera they see in Pretty Woman. It was incredible. The story is set in mid 19th-century upper-class France, and the production stayed true to this. The sets and costumes were ornate and gorgeous, the singing was amazing, the music was powerful and moving. It was a perfect opera experience. They actually simulcasted it live to the Nationals Ballpark, so anyone could go sit on the infield and watch it live on the jumbotron for free. I'm guessing there were some opera fans born at the ballpark last night.
After the opera, I went with Lanie, my boss from this summer, to the Opening Night Gala at the Italian Embassy. It was no Opera Ball, but impressive enough. Rather than being an open-mingle type event, it was actually a sit down dinner. Between courses the opera's President, Executive Director, and General Director Placido Domingo spoke, acknowledging special guests, cast members, and others in the audience. The dinner was pretty good. I had veal for the first time, and actually kind of liked it! And, the dessert was amazing. The tables were gorgeous, but the Italian Embassy was not very impressive. Actually, it wasn't impressive at all. A little disappointing. But, overall it was an amazing night, and I felt very special to be able to jet across the country just to go to an opera and fancy party!
After the opera, I went with Lanie, my boss from this summer, to the Opening Night Gala at the Italian Embassy. It was no Opera Ball, but impressive enough. Rather than being an open-mingle type event, it was actually a sit down dinner. Between courses the opera's President, Executive Director, and General Director Placido Domingo spoke, acknowledging special guests, cast members, and others in the audience. The dinner was pretty good. I had veal for the first time, and actually kind of liked it! And, the dessert was amazing. The tables were gorgeous, but the Italian Embassy was not very impressive. Actually, it wasn't impressive at all. A little disappointing. But, overall it was an amazing night, and I felt very special to be able to jet across the country just to go to an opera and fancy party!
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
"Passionate Possession"
"I have said that Texas is a state of mind, but I think it is more than that. It is a mystique closely approximating a religion. And this is true to the extent that people either passionately love Texas or passionately hate it and, as in other religions, few people dare to inspect it for fear of losing their bearings in mystery or paradox. But I think there will be little quarrel with my feeling that Texas is one thing. For all its enormous range of space, climate, and physical appearance, and for all the internal squabbles, contentions, and strivings, Texas has a tight cohesiveness perhaps stronger than any other section of America. Rich, poor, Panhandle, Gulf, city, country, Texas is the obsession, the proper study and the passionate possession of all Texans."
-John Steinbeck
Interesting quote a fellow Texan shared with me. I wouldn't call it an "obsession" for me personally, but "passionate possession" could be accurate. All I know is I sure am looking forward to crossing the good ol' Red River Sunday afternoon.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
The Playlist (in chronological order)
Elektra, by Richard Strauss
When: Thursday, May 15, 2008, 7:30pm
Where: Kennedy Center Opera House, Washington, DC
What: Opera, 1 act
Who: Washington National Opera
Cast highlights: Susan Bullock, Christine Goerke, Irina Mishura, Robert Cantrell, Daniel Sumegi
While Elektra is only about an hour long, it has more intensity packed into it than most three-hour operas! I mean, it was intense, in every sense of the word - the music, the plot, the characters, the scenery… Intense. I enjoyed getting to see it, but I must say, it was not my favorite. The orchestra frequently overpowered the singers (understandably so, since it is written for a huge orchestra), and while I appreciate the modern-style costumes and scenery being symbolic of the tormented mind of the main character, it was just plain not pretty. And I like my opera pretty. Maybe that’s uncultured of me, but it’s the truth. I like to watch sets and costumes and characters that are pretty.
El Niño by John Adams
When: Sunday, May 18, 2008, 7:30pm
Where: Kennedy Center Concert Hall, Washington, DC
What: Oratorio (sacred text)
Who: The Choral Arts Society of Washington
Cast highlights: Sharla Nafziger, Leslie Mutchler, Christopheren Nomura, Brian Cummings, Paul Flight, Steven Rickards, Children's Chorus of Washington
My sister Nancy and I went to this concert together. It is a modern work, so naturally there were a lot of parts I liked, and a lot I didn't. The text of El Niño is a collection of writings/scripture about the birth of Christ, but it is more focused on birth in general, specifically from the woman's perspective. I actually really enjoyed the text. It consisted of a choir, soloists, orchestra, and a large screen over the stage with scenes to help depict the message the music. After a few minutes I mostly quit paying attention to the screen. It was a lot of modern dance and pictures which I didn't entirely understand, so it was more of a distraction than anything else for me.
Tamerlano, by George Frideric Handel
When: Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Where: Kennedy Center Opera House, Washington, DC
What: Opera, 3 acts
Who: Washington National Opera
Cast highlights: Sarah Coburn, Patricia Bardon, Plácido Domingo, David Daniels
I still get excited just thinking about Tamerlano. It was absolutely, hands-down the best opera I have ever seen. I can’t even express how much I loved it! The cast, production, and music were all top of the line. Sarah Coburn completely stole the show with her beautiful, pure, natural, effortless soprano sound. She and Patricia Bardon (a mezzo-soprano playing a male role) performed a gorgeous duet in the 3rd act that absolutely turned my insides to mush. The rest of the audience apparently felt the same way, because I have never witnessed such a long applause at the end of a number mid-act. Of course Plácido Domingo was fabulous. I have never seen anyone die so beautifully! I even enjoyed listening to David Daniels, the countertenor. Normally I have a hard time with countertenors. I acknowledge that it takes a huge amount of talent for a male to sing as high as a mezzo soprano, but lets be honest, it’s just a little weird. But David Daniels was fabulous. He made it sound natural and effortless, which is not always the case with a countertenor. Seriously, I can’t think of a thing I didn’t like about Tamerlano.
It was completely sold out, but I managed to snag a "standing room only" ticket. I stood in the back next to a railing, where I had to crouch down to see the supertitles over the stage, for over three hours. It reminded me very much of an Aggie football game, where all the students stand the entire game. You only get to sit down during half-time (or intermission in this case), and it feels so good. But the fact of the matter is that even though you're tired and your feet are killing you, what you are witnessing is so exciting that you are completely on a high by the time its over. Yes, thats how good Tamerlano was. I would stand through it again any day.
Selections from Giacomo Puccini's La Bohéme
When: Thursday, May 29, 2008, 7:30pm
Where: Kennedy Center Opera House, Washington, DC
What: Open Orchestra Rehearsal
Who: Washington National Opera
Cast highlights: WNO Young Artists Aundi Marie Moore, Elizabeth Andrews Roberts, Yingxi Zhang, Oleksandr Pushniak
This was very cool. The opera decided to open up this rehearsal to its season ticket holders to give them an inside look at the rehearsal process. The conductor, Riccardo Frizza, was mic-ed so that we could hear everything going on. They began with just the orchestra and conductor rehearsing, and then brought in the singers and added them. One of my favorite parts was when the conductor turned to the audience and said in his thick Italian accent "the problem with singers is that they are always acting, and they forget to pay attention to the baton." Maybe you had to be there, but it was really funny the way he said it. After the one-hour rehearsal they opened up for questions with the singers, conductor, and WNO's Artistic Director. I kept quiet so that the subscribers could ask questions (I can ask questions whenever I want to). Most of the questions were directed at the singers. When asked how long it takes to learn a new role, Elizabeth Andrews Roberts replied that when you are a young aspiring singer like them, if someone asks you if you can perform tomorrow, the answer is always "yes."
Cavalleria Rusticana by Pietro Mascagni
When: Friday, May 30, 2008, 7:30pm
Where: Kennedy Center Opera House, Washington, DC
What: Opera, 1 act, in concert (no sets/costumes, orchestra on the stage)
Who: Washington National Opera
Cast highlights: Salvatore Licitra, Dolora Zajick, Madeleine Gray, Gordon Hawkins, Leslie Mutchler
This was a wonderful production. The cast did a great job of acting out the parts even though they were not in costume. I have a confession, though. I went straight to the opera after work and didn't get a good dinner. About half way through I found myself unable to focus on anything besides what I would grab to eat on the way home. Wendy's or Chick-fil-A? Chic-fil-A won't be open this late, so I'll have to go to Wendy's. I want french fries, but I have to get some real food too! No, I'm not in the mood for a sandwich. Chicken nuggets?... It was very sad indeed.
Eugene Onegin, by Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky
When: Thursday, June 12, 2008, 7:00pm
Where: Kennedy Center Concert Hall, Washington, DC
What: Opera, 3 acts, in concert (no sets/costumes, orchestra on the stage)
Who: National Symphony Orchestra
Cast highlights: Irina Mataeva, Sergei Leiferkus, Daniil Shtoda, Irina Tchistjakova, Ekaterina Semenchuk
I really didn't know what to expect with this one, but I was pleasantly surprised! It was a wonderful opera in every way from the music to the plot to the performers. Who knew Russian could sound so pretty? I would really like to see the full production of this opera some day.
Now do you understand why I've been so busy? It should be slowing down for the rest of the summer because our season is now over as well as The National Symphony Orchestra's.
Did I mention that I didn't pay a cent for any of these? My internship totally rocks.
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